I Can't Live Without You
by o0Kae-lyn0o
Summary: Naruto has left Konoha and Sasuke searches for him to tell him of his love. One-Shot, Songfic, SasuNaru yaoi


**Disclaimer**: Naruto and Sasuke are not mine... wails   
**A/N**: well there ya go. My first attempt at a one-shot. Hmm on second thought, I suppose it IS a songfic... hahah yeah, I used Mariah Carey's 'I Can't Live Without You'... Tell me if it's good or not please?? I think Sasuke acts a bit OOC at the end but o well... anyhoo. Thnx for reading and leave reviews!! Aite – here we go!  
  
I Can't Live Without You  
  
Sasuke cursed himself. He should have known. He should have reacted faster, done more. Maybe if he had been wiser none of this would have happened. If only. If only. Lost possibilities flickered through his mind, mingling with his growing guilt and self-anger. He paused in his running and hunched over, clutching his stomach and heaving for breath. Shit! He was never going to make it. He shook his head violently – NO! don't think like that, he chided himself. Straightening, he grimaced at the pain that shot through his entire body. Gods, he was tired. He had been running for – how long had it been? Three? Four days? When had he last eaten? Or slept? It didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered except for HIM. Setting off once more, his mind drifted to the night everything fell apart.  
  
"Sasuke-kuuuun!" a distinctive squeal rose above the loud murmurings of the gathered people. Sasuke sighed and braced himself for the impact. An instant later, a pink-haired blur attached itself to his arm. Sakura's eyes were bright and her face a little too red. Sasuke guessed she probably already had a drink or two.  
  
"Sasuke-kun! You look so gooood! Dance with me, please? Please? You know you want tooooo..." Sasuke grimaced. Definitely one too many drinks.  
  
"Sakura..." he said patiently as he attempted to detach himself. "you should go home – you're drunk."  
  
The girl in question giggled hysterically. "But why would I want to go home when you're here?"  
  
Sasuke sighed again. Fortunately, he was spared from having to answer by a commotion nearby. He turned his head toward it and immediately recognized the familiar blonde boy in the middle. Shaking Sakura off finally, he wandered over to the gathering. As he approached, Naruto caught sight of him and waved. His trademark grin spread quickly across his face as he greeted Sasuke.  
  
"Sasuke!" he yelled. "You're just in time for a drinking competition!" Naruto laughed as he raised a bottle in his direction.  
  
"Dobe, I don't drink," Sasuke replied. Still, a ghost of a smile flickered across his face.  
  
"Aww, c'mon! It's your own birthday party and you can't even enjoy a good drink?? Don't be such a girl, Sasuke, at least drink one with me!" Naruto pleaded as he bounded over to the dark-haired boy and grabbed his arm.  
  
Sasuke shivered at the small contact. He looked into deep, brilliant blue eyes and immediately regretted it. Damnit. He never could resist Naruto's pleas. Not that time with Orochimaru, nor this. His shoulders dropped in defeat.  
  
"Fine," he mumbled. "Only one."  
  
Naruto broke out into an easy laugh as he handed Sasuke a bottle. Raising his own he proclaimed a toast to Sasuke – everyone drank and all was well.

* * *

Five bottles later, Naruto was quite a different person. His laughter rang out, loud and rude, and he stumbled here and there, enjoying the company of all his other drunk teammates. Sasuke rolled his eyes as he watched the blonde. Having stuck to his promise of one bottle, he was spared the embarrassment of drunkenness. Naruto weaved his way through the remaining people to him.  
  
"Heeey, Sasuke, d'you think I'm drunk...?" he slurred. Sasuke repressed a sigh of annoyance.  
  
"Naruto, go get some fresh air."  
  
Naruto shook his head stubbornly. "No. Not unless you go wit me."  
  
"Fine! Just go before you puke on someone." Sasuke grabbed Naruto and steered him out of the room to the backyard of his house. He flung open the door and the two of them stumbled out into the cool night air. Naruto immediately straightened and removed himself from Sasuke's grip. He walked over to the bench that was situated under the giant oak tree and sat. He turned slightly and motioned for Sasuke to join him.  
  
"What the hell," Sasuke said as he walked over there. "I thought you were drunk."  
  
Naruto snorted. "I only had five bottles. I don't get THAT drunk from five bottles." He paused for a moment before answering the unspoken question. "I just needed to get away for a bit, that's all."  
  
Sasuke nodded understandably. Both boys turned away from each other and stared at the clear, star-filled sky. Minutes passed in comfortable silence as they contemplated the night – each lost in their own thoughts.  
  
Quietly, Naruto broke the silence. "Sasuke?"  
  
"Mm?"  
  
"Do you ever get the feeling that you shouldn't be here?"  
  
Sasuke was surprised. He hadn't even known this side of Naruto even existed. He decided to be as honest with Naruto as Naruto was with him. "Sometimes. Why?"  
  
A long pause stretched out. Sasuke was about to restate his question when Naruto answered. "Maybe it's the truth."  
  
"What is?"  
  
"That we don't belong."  
  
Sasuke turned to study his friend. Maybe this was the sake talking. But when Naruto turned his head and Sasuke fell into the clear depths of his eyes – he knew then that Naruto was not lying. Uneasiness rose within him. He wasn't used to this Naruto – the complete opposite of the usual loud, obnoxious, HAPPY boy.  
  
"Naruto," he began hesitantly. However, he was interrupted when the blonde's eyes suddenly widened and he clamped a hand to his mouth. Unable to hold it in, Naruto turned away from Sasuke and disposed of his dinner.  
  
"Shit!" Sasuke cursed. "I thought you said you weren't drunk!"  
  
"I'm not!"  
  
"Yeah, right. You're gonna hafta stay here tonight – I have no intention of escorting you to the other side of town."  
  
"... It's not my fault I live so far aw-"Naruto's sentence remained unfinished as he started heaving again. "Ugh..."  
  
"Dobe," came the unsympathetic reply. "I told you not to drink so much."  
  
All Sasuke got as an answer was another groan. Inwardly he sighed. Stupid Naruto. He rose smoothly from the bench and leaned over to help his friend. Together, the two boys walked slowly back into the house. Everyone had left already and Sasuke was dismayed at the mess they had left behind. Carefully, they picked their way through the debris to the stairs. By that time, Naruto was breathing hard and was leaning more and more of his weight on Sasuke.  
  
Sasuke regarded him and his expression softened. "Can you get up the stairs?"  
  
Naruto shook his head. Sasuke considered his options. He could either leave Naruto on the couch, or carry him up the stairs. A low moan hastened his decision.  
  
"Hold still." With that, Sasuke gently lifted him in his arms. The blonde rested his pounding head on Sasuke's shoulder. Naruto smiled faintly – he could hear the other boy's heart. Sasuke mounted the stairs slowly. He could smell Naruto's distinct scent of vanilla and fresh air. He willed his heart to not speed up. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he reached the top of the stairs. He turned right and into the spare guest room. Gently, he set his friend down on the small bed. Naruto smiled sleepily.  
  
"Thanks" Sasuke nodded, not trusting his voice. He turned to go but stopped when Naruto spoke again.  
  
"Sasuke?"  
  
A pause. "Yes?" he turned around and walked back to Naruto's side. Staring into his eyes, he noticed something darker that he hadn't noticed before. He shuddered as the darkness grew and filled Naruto's blue eyes.  
  
"Thank you for everything. I won't forget you." Underneath Naruto's soft, even voice, Sasuke was sure he heard something else. He couldn't figure it out. Was it regret he heard? Sorrow? Confused he watched as his friend smiled at him. There was something wrong with his smile too. It was too... sad. Returning to his own room, Sasuke wondered at what had just happened. An uneasy feeling grew in his heart – something was not right.  
  
That night, Sasuke tossed and turned for hours before falling into a fitful sleep.

* * *

When he awoke the next morning, Sasuke had made up his mind to confront Naruto about last night. That settled, he got out of bed, quickly showered, and dressed. He came out of his room and quietly pushed open the door to the guest room. An empty room greeted him. The bed was made and there was no evidence to point to Naruto ever having been there. He must have returned home, Sasuke concluded when a search of the rest of the house produced similar results.  
  
For the next week, Sasuke heard nothing from the blonde. It was not unusual, considering that they had been put on different ANBU teams, to not hear from Naruto for three or four days. But, the blonde would always seek him out sooner or later – usually in want of ramen. So, Sasuke consoled himself with that and waited. As the days went by, however, his anxiety grew. He couldn't help but replay that night's conversation over and over in his mind. Finally, on the ninth day, he went over to the blonde's apartment.  
  
As he approached the small apartment building, the sense of wrongness within him expanded. Sasuke breathed deeply, scolding his irrational fear. Naruto was fine. He just got busy with his work and hadn't had time to come visit, that's all. He climbed the stairs to the second floor, mind flashing to the stairs at home. Sasuke knocked on the wooden door. A long moment passed. Impatient with worry, he tried the doorknob. It didn't surprise him when it turned. Naruto was never one to lock his doors.  
  
"Naruto?" he called. Upon receiving no response, he stepped inside. Shock numbed him immediately as the empty silence roared in his ears. Emptiness was everywhere. The floor was bare, the walls devoid of any hangings, the furniture gone. Nothing remained. Sasuke sat down, hard. His disbelieving eyes roamed over the room, picking out spots where things should have been. The bed should have been in that corner, the dresser over there. The small, stained table should have been there, and Naruto's stash of ramen should have been in there. And Naruto... Naruto should have been HERE. Here – in front of Sasuke. Sasuke's vision blurred as tears threatened to spill. Since when had he come to need Naruto this much? Since when had the blonde's presence become such a necessity in his life?  
  
Since when had he come to love him so much?  
  
Sobs broke through as Sasuke pounded on the bare floor, his soul in anguish over what he had lost. He should have known! His punches accompanied his tortured thoughts. He. Bam. Should. Bam. Have. Bam. Known! BAM. Minutes passed and Sasuke eventually calmed down. His eyes were dry now, but dull with hopelessness. He sat back on his heels and examined the dents he put in the floor. The weariness of loss clouded his expression.  
  
Memories of Naruto flooded his mind. Naruto laughing. Naruto eating. Naruto fighting. Memories of Naruto and the time they spent together pounded against the side of his skull. He squeezed his eyes shut in a futile attempt to block the images. How the hell did Naruto expect him to carry on after this? It wasn't possible.  
  
"Naruto," Sasuke whispered, half hoping he would hear. "Naruto. Don't you know? Don't you know, Naruto? I can't live without you."  
  
When he reopened his eyes, Sasuke's mind was set. He picked himself off of the floor, breathed in Naruto's lingering scent, and walked quickly out the door. Upon reaching the street, he broke out into a run. _Naruto_!

* * *

No I **can't** **forget** this evening  
  
Or your face as you were **leaving**  
  
But I guess that's just the way  
  
The **story** goes  
  
You always **smile** but in your **eyes**  
  
Your **sorrow** shows  
  
Yes it **shows**

* * *

Sasuke stumbled. His dark, sweat soaked hair hung limply around his face, stray strands obscuring his vision. He was too tired to care, too tired to push the hair away from his eyes. Doggedly, he kept running, one foot in front of the other. His breath came in ragged huffs and he could feel the rawness of his throat. Eyes blurred with weariness, he failed to see the small stone.  
  
His foot caught and Sasuke felt himself falling forward. Instinctively, he raised his leaden arms to break his fall. The impact came and for a second, he could not breathe. When he caught his breath again, he lay there, body heaving with exertion. Sasuke felt tears of frustration gathering in the corners of his eyes. Damnit! Why was his body so stupid? Didn't it understand the urgency? Tiredness crept up his legs and into his chest. The pale boy found his eyes closing. He needed rest. He'd been running for days without stopping.  
  
Sasuke allowed a small sigh to escape his lips. Finally, he permitted himself to relax and rest. He was so tired. So incredibly tired. The moment before he dozed off, an image of Naruto flashed through his mind. Sasuke's eyes snapped open as a fresh wave of longing and pain shot through his heart.  
  
"Naruto..." he whispered awkwardly through cracked lips. He struggled to his feet, pleading with his unwilling body to cooperate. Just a couple more miles. Stumbling, he started walking again. To fight his growing weariness, Sasuke replayed all his memories of Naruto. Seeing how he'd been in love with the blonde for near 10 years now – he had quite a few memories stored. They sustained him and took his mind off of his pain.  
  
Suddenly, a drop of wetness broke his reveries. Startled, Sasuke looked up in time to see millions more raindrops falling to the earth. As the first drops hit him, he opened his mouth, attempting to soothe his parched tongue with the water. Sasuke stood there, swaying in the rain, drinking in the pure, refreshing water. His clothes quickly became soaked and he welcomed the coolness. It didn't take very long though, for the chill to sink in. Sasuke reluctantly brought his head back down and started to move again.  
  
Sasuke walked now with his head down, in a futile attempt to keep the rainwater out of his eyes. He concentrated on nothing but his feet. Left. Right. Left. Right. Keep going. Just keep walking. His weariness was so distracting that he failed to notice where he was going. Surprised, he glanced up at the clearing that he had wandered into. From a small pit, smoke rose lazily and nearby, a tent was sent up. Sasuke wondered dazedly who camped here and whether or not they could spare any food for him.  
  
A sudden noise came and Sasuke's eyes snapped up to the direction it came from. A second passed before a figure appeared in the rain. Sasuke stared in shock. Between the trees, a blonde stepped out, his hair dripping but shining in what Sasuke thought was an angel's halo. His bright orange clothes clung damply to his toned body and in his arms, a pile of kindling and wood rested. Sasuke stared as waves of hysterical relief ran through his body. He felt the same jerking feeling in his stomach as he met the boy's clear cerulean eyes.  
  
_I could drown in those eyes_, he thought hazily.  
  
"Sasuke?" shock was clearly evident in the blonde's voice.  
  
"Naruto..." Sasuke felt his lips curve up into a tired smile. His legs finally gave way and he saw the ground rush up to him. Closing his eyes, he braced himself for the impact that never came. Slowly, he realized that strong arms encircled him and held him lightly but securely. His body relaxed as he breathed in Naruto's soothing scent. His eyes flicked upwards and he gazed wonderingly into deep blue eyes even as blackness closed in on him and claimed him.

* * *

No I can't forget **tomorrow**  
  
When I think of all my **sorrow**  
  
When I had you there  
  
But then I **let** **you** **go**  
  
And now it's only fair  
  
That I should **let** **you** **know**  
  
What you should know

* * *

Sasuke awoke slowly to an aching body. He moaned softly at the pain that had taken residence in him legs. Warmth surrounded him and for a second he contemplated falling back asleep. In a flash, he remembered that he had finally found Naruto. He sat up quickly, ignoring his protesting body, and stumbled out of the tent into the clear night air.  
  
Naruto sat in front of the fire, feeding it kindling distractedly. The bright flames lit the clearing and threw shadows on his blank face. Hearing Sasuke come, he lifted his head and stared at his friend. Confusion was still apparent in his eyes. Sasuke drank in the sight of Naruto hungrily as he walked unsteadily toward him. He had come so close to losing him. Never taking his eyes off Naruto, he found a clear spot near him and sat. Naruto looked at Sasuke and quickly looked away. In a moment, he spoke softly.  
  
"Why did you come after me?"  
  
Sasuke felt his heart twist. After all this time, Naruto still didn't know. "Naruto... haven't you figured it out by now?"  
  
Caught by surprise, Naruto turned back to Sasuke. "What do you mean?"  
  
Sasuke moved closer to Naruto and in a sudden wave of relief, he reached out and pulled him into his arms. He tightened his embrace as he buried his face in Naruto's neck, breathing in the scent of oranges. Hesitantly, after a moment or two, Naruto placed his own hands on Sasuke's back. They remained like that, in an emotional embrace, for several minutes. Eventually, Sasuke pulled away slightly. He caught Naruto's gaze and held it firmly as he cupped the blonde's face in his hands.  
  
"I love you."  
  
Naruto's already wide eyes widened even more. He searched dark onyx eyes for any hint of humor but could not find it. His mind was in a turmoil and his bewilderment showed on his face.  
  
"...But, Sasuke... why? You can't be sure of that..."  
  
Sasuke thought seriously for a moment before responding. "I love you because you are the only one who managed to bring me back from the edge of Hell. I love you because you are the only one who can make me laugh when the world seems dark. I love you because of your smile, you laughter, your energy, your _light_. Naruto, every day I wake up with your face in my mind and your voice in my ears. And when I discovered you were gone? Do you know how much _anguish_ I felt? It was as if the sun had been ripped from the sky and my world was plunged into darkness." Sasuke paused for breath, a bit surprised at his own outburst. He didn't normally say this much in an entire day.  
  
Sasuke looked deeply into Naruto's eyes before continuing. "Naruto... don't try to tell me that I don't love you. You said that you didn't feel like you belonged in Konoha. The only reason why you wouldn't belong there is because you belong here." Sasuke touched his chest lightly. "You belong with me."  
  
Tears were streaming freely down Naruto's face now. "Sasuke..."  
  
"...please. Come home with me."  
  
Slowly Naruto nodded and Sasuke breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"....Sasuke?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"...I love you too."  
  
Sasuke felt an incredibly light feeling overtake him as joy spread throughout his body. Slowly, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Naruto's. Tingling shot up and down his spine. He pulled back, fearing that Naruto wouldn't approve. Instead, as he met crystal blue eyes, he saw nothing but love and joy. Smiling, he leaned forward once more.

* * *

I can't **live**  
  
If living is **without** **you**  
  
I **can't** live  
  
I can't **give** anymore  
  
_**I can't live**  
_

* * *

**A/N**: WELL! There ya go! Hope you guys enjoyed it!!! Hahah. Aite laaaater. 


End file.
